I sat in the Subway sandwich shop this morning. Eating my Teriaki Chicken on flatbread. Over the radio came the Adele song, Rumor Has It…
“…Rumor has it, I’m the one he’s leaving you for.”
P!nk had just been singing “3 years ago if someone had said, You’d be gone, I’d ha’ punched ’em out…”
Such love quarrels and triangles going on in today’s world. Music is saturated. Life is beefed up with all this extra “beef.” Hey Arby’s, can I get extra beef with that? SURE!
But I sit cute as a kitten and calm as the sunny spring day I walked through to come here… Only, something is missing, and it would be ironic to spell it out. You see see, I’m not that great of a speller, at least not for social problems. I didn’t major in sociology like my younger sister.
I learned cryptology from a woman I met. It goes like this, everything you say, put it in a riddle, and no one will ever know exactly what you’re saying. It worked great for her, until her youngest of 5 spelled it out clearly as often youngsters do! Then, the gig was up. I was “El loco” after first being of “Los Marmotas.” It’s sad to have to talk about people as though they were set in stone and incapable of changing, but I want to, just for a second. Because even Medusa needs to be defined. Ya see, when I met her, I had been working hard to complete two years hard 12-hour days pounding streets walkie talkieing from 9:30 to 9:30 every day. My brain had fused with my neck just to keep my head upright because I was falling asleep in the night meetings in exhaustion. So the riddle woman did just enough to snap my brain. It shattered into a thousand million billion trillion pieces, and then I wondered why my thumb got sore from cutting from the jagged edges.
The very first words she spoke were a riddle. It began as I am saying, “Hey, is there a man in the house, ’cause ya know, like um…, we can’t be with singly housed women in … uh… their…uh…ya know… uh… houses-like places-kinda-sorta like places.” And she, of course, Riddler that she is (Some call them lies, but they’ve been so fun to figure out that I call them riddles.) “Oh, of course there is!” She said. I started to think I’d dodged a bullet, but right then my brain went into infinite loop mode. “What did she say!! What did she mean!! What did she say!! What did she mean!!”
And the eternal query in my head of the twelve stars around the head of the pregnant woman of-man-child-pregnant. Kakuru gods, remember me how to count to 12. Kakuru gods, remember me how to count to twelve. Space held its frame, and the words of the book of Job 38:11 came true: Hitherto shalt thou come and no further. I was set in stone by Medusa herself.
Oops. Can anyone hit that pause button again, ’cause I’d like to unpause my life and move forward again… … … boop beep boop. Boop beep boop. … Nope. Okay then, can someone show me where to go? Boop beep boop. Boop beep boop. Nope. Okay then, can anyone remind me what I’m supposed to do? Boop beep beep boop. Boop beep beep boop. Nope. And from then on, the heavens were sealed, and every curse pronounced by Moses all the wicked fell from the sky right on top of me. Boils from the head to the toe. Madness. Slavery. No one taking me in. No harvest of my fruits. Going to war by 1, fleeing by 7. Wishing it morning it were night and by night that it were morning. Heavens made of bronze and ground made of iron. Oh, wow! Did that make my feet sore! And it still does…only…Add 5 +5 equals five prepared virgins plus 5 unprepared virgins + the Lamb of God + plus Lucifer herself. Hmmm…yea, that does equal 12. And the all stars rotate around poor said virgin’s head. Ouch!
So the unprepared virgins said to the good, Give us your oil or else! And the earlier workers said to the late, we deserve more than you, now give! And the fight broke out in heaven! And the fight broke out in heaven! As Lucifer said, Give it all to everyone and justice never was done. And the fight broke out in heaven, and the fight broke out in heaven. Faithful virgins now wielding knives in defense of the oil they earned. And the later laborers defending their rights to identity and inheritances earned. And a fight broke out in heaven. Until justice was finally done…One more time–And a fight broke out in heaven.
But the riddler, where did she go? After that poison kiss, and I still this morning was wiping it off. Rumor has it… ya know. And still this morning I was wiping it off.
I didn’t can extra beans for the summer. In fact, I don’t do any canning, like my mother does. Again and again. If it can’t be canned, then it must not be edible.
Anyway, I wanted to say something, and I guess I get sidetracked, Because , let’s face it, there are a lot of tracks to side off on. Like, March Madness and that prayer for a 1 seed to knock off a 16. Those prayers for Hollywood, that stars stop getting robbed of money and naked pictures. The prayers for my mother just to give me a chance in life and let me comb my own damned hair. But see, all of these prayers avail me nothing, because I have no faith in these causes.
You know what I do have faith in? No, let me say that differently, Do you know what I want to have faith in? CARTOONS!!! But that ship has sailed, or has it?
I’m sorry, but it is just getting really lame trying to keep up with who is battling whom in the media? Now, are we on the Muslims’ side because of the Trump or on the Mexicans’ side because of the Trump or if the Muslims and the Mexicans fight, then whose side am I supposed to take? This is just too much to calculate! C’mon people. Make things easy for me, would you? Does everything have to be based around hate? Oh wait, maybe these questions themselves are a little too “triggering” and “probing” as some have told me, but I digress. I started this sad bloog (It’s not worthy to be called a BLOG for obvious reasons) because, well, goddammit, somebody else was doing it, and I wanted to fit in. And now I’m not even doing that either. So, hey, here’s an idea, all of you wolves dressed in sheep’s clothing, rip your sheep’s skin off. And you sheep dressed in wolves’ clothing, rip your wolf clothing off! Okay, there we go…now I can see better.